Temporary Feeling

I feel so uncomfortable in my own body right now. I don't want to eat, nor go out, nor sleep, nor game, not even hang out with anyone. My body feels so strange and I hate this feeling. I can't really do shit properly because I feel like something is being held at my throat constantly. I try to take my mind off it, and for a moment it works. But there are times like now where I feel sick. Not the sick you'd think of first. I hate this because I can't even describe this feeling and maybe no one ever will be able to understand it. Tears are constantly welling up but not because I feel sad, mad, happy, or scared, it's because I can't explain what this feeling is. I just feel like shit, and no one has the time or patience to be able to deal with me acting this way. I hate it because no one will be able to sympathize with this feeling ever. At the moment I am crying because I can't take it anymore. I'm in a house full of loud and obnoxious family members with thin walls. And yet because I've tried before to express myself I already know that they would either lecture me or cast my feelings away as "temporary."

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anonymous Miscellaneous September 17, 2021 at 11:31 pm 0 0